(With apologies to Marcel Proust). We asked our UK editor Giles Coren to answer the Truth, Love & Clean Cutlery Questionnaire. There are only two rules – you have to tell the Truth, and do it with Love

Giles Coren is a London-based columnist and award-winning restaurant critic for The Times newspaper. He is author of the best-selling How To Eat Out, presenter of two current hit BBC TV series, Back In Time For Dinner and Amazing Hotels, and is editor-at-large of Esquire UK.

What is your idea of perfect happiness? Watching cricket on television with my five-year-old son curled up under my arm and my seven-year-old daughter reading a book at the other end of the sofa.

What is the purest thing you have ever tasted? Any time I drink water from a fountain on Hampstead Heath halfway through a run on a hot day.

What is the best thing you can do with your hands? Seriously? Without mentioning sex? I dunno, clap your kid winning the running race at the school sports day? (I’ve done that with both kids – they’re quick).

What do you love most about what you do? The fact that a night out in a restaurant is never spoiled by crap food or rude service or rip-off pricing – because if any of those occurs it’s just good copy, someone else is paying and nobody has to feel bad.

What do you consider the most overrated ingredient? Dill.

What’s the best thing you’ve ever been taught? My father taught me that when considering writing something you should ignore the first thing that comes into your head because everyone will have thought of that. Then throw away the second thing that comes into your head because the smart guys will have thought of that. Then write the third idea that comes into your head, because nobody will have thought of that but you.

Is there anything you don’t particularly care to eat? Foie gras. Vulgar. Cruel. Stupid. Wrong.

If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be? Myself, but with more sex in my youth.

Are there any mentors or food heroes you would like to thank? Gordon Ramsay got me on telly the first time so I guess I could thank him. But he’d only tell me to f*** off.

What do you make from scratch? Everything.

What would you be doing if you weren’t doing what you are doing? Writing novels.

How do you like to spend your day off? I don’t have and on and off days. I do whatever I want, whenever I want. But as my favourite things are writing and being with my family, it all pans out.

What does success mean to you? Nothing.

What is your current obsession, the thing you think about at 3am? I’m asleep at 3am. And I’m not an obsessive person anyway.

What are the qualities you most admire in others? Being even-tempered.

Which three words best describe your cooking style? Lazy.

If you could eat only one thing today, what would it be? A baked potato with lots of butter and salt and black pepper.

What do you see when you think of the cuisine of your own country? Steak and kidney pie.

Which producer or supplier really brightens your day? Meat NW5.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse? None. I am very careful only ever to say and write new things.

What do you think the food of the future will look like? No idea.

Do you have a motto or mantra? Aim low and succeed.